I really have to...

get over this depression that comes over me the night before it's time to work at Abby's school.

I have a good time every time I work. I have noticed from day one what a difference it makes to be IN the school, part of the everyday routine, really seeing how everything works.

It's not just "oh good, this school is nice and good to Abby" - I also see the more public side of my little five year old. She can be just as rude to another child as other children have been to her and she can also be just as courageously nice as I've seen other children be with one another. It's a very balancing experience to be there. I see her outside the bubble of only our interaction/family. I also see first hand some of the incredible little victories she must have everyday without me.

I know she loves that I'm there. And that in itself is enough. REALLY. Seriously. It is.


It's just that I'm so very tired. And my brain doesn't seem to have much of an attention span.


BUT I'm always glad I've been there. In the three years Abby has been there I have rarely left a work day feeling yuck about the day. I can't remember ever really, but I don't want to sound too la-la about it.

Come to think of it, the routine, the ability to predict basically what happens at any given moment - it is easier to work at the school then to keep up with Jack-Jack. And I'm so lucky that my mom watches him so I don't have any concerns about what chaos he's causing with someone.

So there is no reason to get depressed.





I'm just so tired... have I mentioned it?