House of Waffles

Today I was reading yet another post from Jen in which she made me laugh out loud and yet also managed to make me choke up at the thought of her comfy pjs being cut up into the rag pile. And I thought how funny Jen can be, and how goofy. And a part of me who was feeling rather drab in comparison said, 'I can be goofy' which I'm sure a lot of you know.

But it's more than her being funny - what makes her so funny to read is because she is SO open. But not 'demean my husband and kid's sort of open, just very 'this is a real slice of me' sort of open. It's not everything, which I'm lucky enough to be certain of since we are more than internet friends, though seriously, that hardly matters since I can be a lot more friendshippy online than I can at home while changing my children's diapers for the sixth time in two hours. Okay, fine, fine, I admit that there is SOME value of actual face to face friendship time, as I have seen when I am lucky enough to hang out with some of my friends... in reality... without typing... like in actual physical space.

Anyway how I felt ...

Sigh, I suppose this is why. The cutee boys are awake. Which means, wel its all about them, which is fine for now.

Read between the lines this post made sense, i swear.

edited to add: No I know. I don't want to be anyone else or in anyone else's shoes. What I was thinking was how I used to be open and now have a really really hard time with it... and nothing in particular has changed in life that has burned me to the point that that should be the case. And Jen's post made me see the difference in myself very clearly.

And I was going to ponder what changed... but...there were little baby butts to take care of.

9 months & counting

Ha. Made you look.

No, nine months of having a family of FIVE and no picture. I do have the ONE Sarah helped me wrangle out of the kids at Easter which I don't like of ME except when I'm looking away from the camera:



The plan? Try family picture today. Don't tell Steve.




Thanks David!!

Ode to Finn

This kid is a charmer. A sweet deliscious little charmer. He's sitting out on Gramma's balcony right now, making eyes at me while he innocently chews on a leaf. When I yell, "No -ew -ick!" he gets wide-eyed and startled (I couldn't possibly be talking about him), then he laughs, (if I'm talking to him in such a manner, I must be joking) and smiles coyly, and puts another leaf in his mouth.

He's a total adventurer. He wanders around his space like neither of the other two ever did put together. He goes for everything that can't be for him, he vaccuums up everything he finds on the ground - thats NOT food of course - where would be the adventure in eating food?

When I put him to bed without nursing he looks at me with this look. This skeptical, "uh- what do you think you're doing- sigh, really? I don't think you want to do this. Let's think this through together, Mom, huh? Be reasonable, I know you'll see it my way."

He's big on eye contact, big on crawling right on through whatever might be in his path - whether it be person or object or door or step. DOesn't seem to matter how annoyed Jack is that Finn is climbing or shadowing him, Finn just keeps right on. It doesn't seem to be his problem if someone is upset, that's for sure. It can't be that he's slapping Jack in the eye while I'm changing the elder's diaper. No, that can't be it, maybe if he pats harder, that will help.

He's patient and hilarious and a big ole' chunk of lovely awesome baby.

Ode to Abby

The thing that still most amazes me about Abby June is her emotional connection with... everything. From herself, to her family, to her friends, to the characters in her stories.

It's easy to miss her while she's gone. Despite the fact that she tends to have a problem figuring out how to STOP TALKING FOR ONE MOMENT FOR THE LOVE OF ALL CREATURES GREAT AND SMALL.... she is also constantly in tune with Jack and Finn. She loves them despite the fact that their love for her is a tad... well a whollop overwhelming. She doesn't even complain when Finn is literally just grabbing fistfulls of her hair just for the fun of it.

I see where the dangers are going to come in, I do. She's so good with them it's hard not to rely on her. And boy, though they think the sun rises and sets by her, they also expect her to concentrate all her attention on them. They are jealous of her distractions and impatient for her reaction.

Of each of the kids she has the most self-doubt. She cares so deeply about people that it acts as a double edged sword. Obviously the negative is that what people do, how they react to her, matters a lot. But on the other side, she is such a people person she attracts people like crazy.

Before she left for DC to visit Auntie Samantha she said she was worried. She said, "I know you want me to meet new friends in DC and have a fun time, but I think I won't be able to. I think people will see this sad face and not see any happiness." (this all because she was going to miss me).

No matter how much she desperately wants to be anywhere than home with anyone but me, it's not personal ;). And she still needs me to come home to.

Ode to Jack

Jack is currently re-dramatizing the entire plot of "Hero of the Rails" much to the thanks of Gramma being a sucker for Thomas the Train as a set and now to me for rushing to get the play along 'patchwork hiro' train.

I am a new sucker to toys. The thing that I think I realize is - though Abby of course loves presents - she loves and has ALWAYS loved people first. A toy, a game, a set of anything was fine, but soon discarded in favor of a person. Therefore, toys to me - always have felt sort of like a shrug - sure she gets a high at first but there are so few presents that have endured for Abby.

Well Jack, my guy, he's a different kettle of fish all together. He sees a story whether it be book or movie and he wants to live it. In fact, anyone trying to play along just rattles him. Well, he still needs us for the books, but I'm sure we'll be discarded in favor of the book as soon as he can read.

I have video of him recreating scenes from CARS in which Mac drives along and McQueen squeels along a dirt track yelling, "Mac! Mac!" and comes along side to say with a lot of gibberish, "Hey, is me, Queen, Mac, oh no!"

He is just so *serious* about it, these are living breathing stories to him. Even the things that aren't even stories. We watch WipeOut and Jack finds the whole thing very contagious. Not only does he jump around on the floor egging on the contestents, "Run, run, run, run OOOOH!" but he creates his own wipeout zone, one that he is determined NOT to go thru unscathed. He jumps and falls but thats not enough - he jumps and he ricochets off the ottoman then back to the couch then, with a dramatic 'oof' to the floor.

You'd think I'd get used to it, but right now as he makes Gordon and Percy help to hide Hiro and distract Spencer - I just think Jack is amazingly wonderfully fantastic.

And then there's the naps. I think I've probably been too embarrassed to say exactly how incredible Jack's naps have been his ENTIRE life.

When Abby was in pre-school from 9-12 Jack would sleep from 9:45-11:30 then more often than not, fall asleep again on our way home from getting Abby. Giving me total free time while Abby was at school.

Then, when she went to Kindergarten he would sleep from 11-2, once again giving me the chance for peace, or the chance to have time with Finn alone.

He transfers mostly from the car. He has a routine that he accepts, nay, even likes. He is reliable mostly. It's really kept me sane these last two and a half years.