It drives me crazy when I don't see a pattern that has been obvious for ages.
Jack has an issue with people.. or crowds... or SOMETHING.
Whenever we have guests, no matter how much he loves them, he doesn't want to be in the main room where everyone is. He insists on being in the toy room here, in Gramma's toy room when there are guests at her house, the living room when there are guests at Zoozy's house. He desperately tries to escape family events like Thanksgiving and other holidays - particularly if they are not in one of his "Safe" houses.
I'm not sure if he's shy or anxious or just plain anti-social. I've known all this but haven't. But recognizing it should help me prepare and change and... oh I don't know. Just... not sure... have noticed the pattern, have not gotten to the labeling the problem yet.
120: Yellow
3 months ago
4 comments:
completely the same pattern with Gus. introverts??
Maybe it is general for most little kids...just carving out a place where they are the focus (so that they can then go ahead and ignore you?) :)
Ben is like that, too. Rachel was always very social and liked getting attention and being with people, but Ben gets overwhelmed. He also has a limited capacity for handling travel away from home.
We just went to my brother's wedding in eastern Oregon. The kids both did fabulously on the long drive each way, despite getting up at 5:15 and not sleeping that much (about 2 hours each for the total of 16 or so hours in the car). But when we were in Ontario and seeing family, he didn't want to go to anyone (even my mom, who he knows very well) and clung to James like he was oxygen. He wouldn't even let me hold him all that long and kept reaching to go back to James.
And when we went to Victoria, B.C. last summer, he didn't do well on the car trip, but he was really good the first 4 days of the trip (other than the driving there). Day 5, however, was apparently too much for him, and it just went downhill from there.
Some kids just like things quieter and more familiar, I think. That's the case with Ben, it seems. I'm sure he'll be able to handle more as he gets older, but it's a challenge to plan trips for now.
Ditto for Alex. Boys maybe? Alex has been an observer since day one. In a social situation, he would only hang out in the fray for so long, and then he would off to the side, or to another room. This was especially evident when he was younger, but has gotten better (not that it's a bad thing) as he has gotten older. Ava? That girl has been looking for a party since the day she was born.
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