On a Serious Note...

This whole honestly being worried about how we are going to pay the bills next year really sucks. Even though Steve is not the sort of guy to verbalize his feelings, I feel like we end up talking about pretty much everything... pretty easily.

But this whole scarey next year thing... i.e. what is he going to do to make enough money to keep us from paying our property tax with a credit card... it's something we can't talk about.

Well, that's not entirely true. We talk about it when we are both in positive states of mind - we talk about proactive ideas on how to stretch this money here and how we'll cut out such and such.

But if either one is in an unpleasant state about it. Worry, stress, sadness, fear... I can't really share that him because it snowballs any dormant feelings of the same in himself.

Seeing as I am not pregnant, I have just tonight realized that my extra emotions this year may not have to do with brownies as much as this hanging over our heads. I mean, I am sure they are kind of connected. After all, I was probably having extra brownie cravings because of the stress and since I am trying to control the emotion gobbling eating thing, I've been down a lot more than perhaps I normally would be.

I don't want Steve to do anything but what he's trying to do. So that leaves us... exactly here.

And here is fantastic if it weren't for that pesky shadow hanging over everything all the time.